Maybe its that in the darkness my flaws are hidden. my doubts, my fears, insecutiries are veiled. But darkness, with it's strange and provocative allure...fools us.
For years i have gone back and forth, in and out of these two worlds. the lines between darkness and light blurs as i try to hide from truth and from transparency and from myself.
I feel i have woven myself into a tangle of brilliant colors, manic depressive tendencies, strong willed arrogance, and a subdued concience.
I know what I believe. I know what is true. And yet, there are days when I switch the light off. Maybe it's too hard...or maybe I am too selfish...I am always fighting to have my way.
And after living in both worlds, after seeing a glimpse of what our culture has idolized....I now know what I desire.